Tuesday, August 27, 2013

The Risk Of Loving Others

            For the past several months our church body has been praying diligently for Doug Hardy. We prayed for healing and we prayed for a liver for Doug. We prayed with expectation and with faith. Sometimes our prayers are not answered in the way we expect or want. Yesterday, Tom Stanfield and I anointed him with oil and knelt beside his bed and prayed with him. Tom and I with open tears expressed our love to the Lord and our love for our brother in Christ, Doug. After we prayed with him we knelt beside Doug’s hospital bed and he breathed his last breath. In the role I am privileged to serve I have been with several as they have breathed their last breath. It is never easy, but it is my calling.
            I interviewed at First Christian almost five and half years ago. After they decided to give this young guy a chance to lead Crystal I prayed hard about if we needed to move to Roanoke Rapids. God had opened a few doors of ministry for us and we wanted to do what first and foremost God wanted us to do. We have always sought to serve where we are needed and can have the biggest impact. We were torn on where to go and what do to. Doug called me and with his direct, but loving approach told me what we needed to do. He said, “I have prayed about it and you need to come to First Christian.” Though I did not know Doug at that point I believed what he said and we moved to Roanoke Rapids. I have jokingly told people two things about that experience. First, we asked ourselves do we want our baby (which was four years down the road as it turned out) to sound like Doug Hardy. Second, if you are not happy I am here at FCC, blame Doug.
            By nature I do not trust easily. However, very quickly I learned to respect, trust, and love Doug Hardy. Doug and I talked out difficult issues within the church that no one else knew were happening. Doug and I went to homes of those that were struggling, had made mistakes, or simply needed someone to talk with. So many times Doug would call me for no other reason, but to check on me and make sure I was alright. I am so accustomed to people calling or making an appointment because they have an issue they need help with or they are upset about something. It was a real blessing having someone that reached out the way Doug did so many times. While Doug is not the only person in my life like this, he is irreplaceable. When I think of Doug Proverbs 17:17 comes to mind. Doug was that kind of friend and I pray I was the same to him.
            When we choose to love someone, in the type of way that Christ commands, it is a risk. There is the danger that we will be hurt. There is the possibility we will be betrayed. There is a chance they will abandon us. However, it is worth the risk. I praise God that I got to know Doug. I praise God that we were placed in each other’s paths to support one another when needed. Perhaps, as a friend told me yesterday, the reason Doug called me and told me to come to FCC was because he needed me to hold his hand as he died and support his beautiful family in the days, months, and years following. We do not mourn like those that have no hope, and thus I can’t wait to see my brother Doug again in glory one day.
            Our congregation has lost a servant leader. Doug served as an elder within the congregation for many years. He saw great times and rough times for the church and was a steady presence through it all. The challenge to us today is to follow his example of servant leadership. We are blessed to have a great group of elders, deacons, staff, Sunday school teachers, and many other ministry leaders. However, I pray with anticipation to see who God raises up to lead with the loss of this leader.

            Please continue to pray for Doug’s family and for our congregation. I know that God has great things in store for us as we continue to serve and honor Him with all our strength, hearts, minds, and souls. 

4 comments:

  1. I have known Doug only for the past year. When I met him, I asked Kim what was cause of his obvious liver disease. She didn't know, so, being the direct personality I am, I asked Doug. He told me in layman's terms what I realized was sclerosing cholangitis, an autoimmune disease for which there is no cure. He was very calm, and I felt as though we were sitting on the veranda of an old Southern country home, in rocking chairs, sharing a glass of sweet tea. He was calm, collected, and he could have been discussing the weather, for all anyone could tell. I knew instantly I liked this man, and over the months, as I watched the slow wasting, and encephalopathy that comes with liver failure, I knew the end was probably not far away. Even the transplant might not save him, his physical state becoming so debilitated. Yet, he kept on, peacefully, and glorified his Creator, taking issue with me on one occaision when I became too analytical about a Biblical issue. He loved his Lord, and he was a staunch believer. Nothing could shake his faith. He lived it, and he practiced it, welcoming me, the sinner that I am, into the flock, treating me as if nothing had ever happened for anyone to be ashamed of. I came to love him, as the brother I want to become. I won't make it, but he has given us all that target, to do his Lord's will.
    Doug managed to hold on to see his oldest girl married, and his youngest off to Meredith. He then rested, and the rest continues to this day. His SC is cured, he is fat and healthy living with the Lord, and sitting on the Master's front porch, rocking, sipping tea, and praying for us all. Thank you, Doug....thank you, Lord.

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  2. Very heart felt and spirit filled tribute to a wonderful person from a wonderful person. I thank God that Doug Hardy told you to come to First Christian. Cheri Parnell

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